You are not perfect and that is perfectly fine.

I love finding inspirational and positive websites about happiness. I love sites where people are feeling good about themselves, good about their neighbours, good about humans and animals. I love it when you find a little something out there that puts a smile on your face, that lifts your spirits.

Here are a few quotes I found that brought a smile to my face. When I'm feeling down I look at them, I try to remember how true these things are and I try to brighten up.

I think everyone deserves to be happy, to be cherished and to be loved. No matter how many flaws we might have, or be percieved to have, I believe there is something to adore in each and every person.
No matter what you might think or hear, you are a worthwhile person in this world, worthy of love, worthy of praise, worthy of time, worthy of existance.

Desire and Determination, Daydreams, Dedication... lots of good things start with a D! No matter what anybody tells you it is not necessary to 'pull your head out of the clouds' in order to make a living or exist on this planet. Losing our dreams, losing our desires, losing that hope is a crushing thing, it destroys happiness.

Dreaming never hurt anybody, on the contrary it spawns millions of brilliant ideas every day. No matter how silly, keep dreaming.

I firmly believe this to be true. Do not hide your feelings from those you have feelings for, be open, be brave and let them know how you really feel.
Despite what you might think people don't often know how great they really are, how endearing that little habit of theirs is, how they make your world light up just seeing their face. It's also the case that we cannot often guess what is on another person's mind, having negative feelings and hiding them for fear of hurting somebody will make it more painful in the long run when they eventually find out.
We all make mistakes, we all have lapses in judgement, we all do things that we later realise were not a very good idea. There is no point beating yourself up over your past, accept it, forgive it, learn from it and sail on.
Do not be afraid of mistakes, of failure, of not making something amazing the first time around. Often great ideas can come from the ashes.

Nobody is completely perfect, but we all have our perfections.

I think perfection is in the eye of the beholder and we always save our most scrutinising eyes for ourselves. There is somebody out there to whom you are the most perfect being in this world.

This is such a small but simple thing that I think people ignore every day. So many people love music, in fact I think love of music and nature is somehow ingrained in each of us.

We all like different things but sometimes you might feel uncomfortable about the things that you like, you might feel ashamed.

I say don't. Why care? Especially about music and clothing, all that matters is that you like it!

So if you like Classical, crank up the Chopin! If you like Rap put on some Snoop Dogg, if you like Country then turn it up. Pop music, Metal music, Goth, Punk, Swing and so on and so forth. There are so many great sounds to fill your head, why bother filling it with the things you don't like?

Why be ashamed of what you like? It is absolutely pointless and a waste of your energy to care what other people think of your music taste, of all things.

I like Marilyn Manson, I like Frank Sinatra, I like Willie Nelson, I like Snoop Dogg, I like Mozart, I like Enya, I like Gackt. I don't care who knows it!

People need to hear it. Even the most confident of us needs to hear it. We may all look like tough little coconuts but often people don't realise their good qualities. There is a tendancy to focus on the negative, the things you're not good at, the 'bad' aspects of your personality or life. Hearing that somebody loves you, hearing praise can really, really help somebody to feel better about themselves.
Don't just reserve it for your significant other. Tell your friends, your parents, your husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, cat, dog, goldfish, postman... whoever!
Go with the flow, follow your instincts, listen to your heart. Get back in touch with everything.

Tell the truth, don't give in to little lies or big lies just because they are easier. It may seem scary to say what you feel but once you get the ball rolling you will feel much better for doing it!
We all bustle around every day with so many things to do that we forget to be courteous to those around us. From my experience I can tell you I've had countless days blighted by rude strangers, there really is no need for it!
Don't be rude or nasty to those around you. Keep your issues to yourself and away from innocent people who have nothing to do with it.
Be polite, even little things make a difference. Hold the door open for somebody, smile at the cashier, say please and thank you, say excuse me, help somebody who needs it, smile more, don't say nasty things to or about people in the street.

Don't make life hard for yourself, don't beat yourself up. Look after yourself, if there is a simple way then take it. Do things that you know will make you happy and avoid anything unnecessary that you know will bring you down.

There is a lot of beauty in the world, so many things to be enjoyed that are just waiting for you. Step away from your desk, go and find some grass, sit in it with someone or alone and watch the birds, listen to music, read a book. Breathe, stop worrying and be happy.

Stop worrying what anybody thinks of you. I truly believe there is nobody in the world whose opinion of you matters more than your own and often your own opinion is the hardest to win over.
Be proud of yourself, ignore the negativity and surround yourself with people who appreciate you. Often people push their negativity and unhappiness outwards, it was never meant for you. Don't take it to heart, let it go.

No matter how silly or fantastical an idea, write it down. Looking back on thoughts and ideas you've had is a lot of fun and it can also help you to understand yourself and get to know yourself more deeply.

"I just want to love God"

"The pandit spoke first. "Mr Patel, Piscine's piety is admirable. In these troubled times it's good to see a boy so keen on God. We all agree on that." The imam and priest nodded. "But he can't be a Hindu, a Christian and a Muslim. It's impossible. He must choose."

"I don't think it's a crime, but I suppose you're right," Father replied.
The three murmured agreement and looked heavenward, as did Father, whence they felt the decision must come. Mother looked at me.
A silence fell heavily on my shoulders.
"Hmmm, Piscine?" Mother nudged me. "How do you feel about the question?"
"Bapu Gandhi said, 'All religions are true.' I just want to love God," I blurted out, red in the face.
My embarrassment was contagious. No one said anything. It happened that we were not far from the statue of Gandhi on the esplanade. Stick in hand, an impish smile on his lips, a twinkle in his eyes, the Mahatma walked. I fancy that he heard our conversation, but that he paid even greater attention to my heart. Father cleared his throat and said in a half voice, "I suppose that's what we're all trying to do - love God."
- Life of Pi by Yann Martel, page 69

I first read Life of Pi in 2008 and this quote has remained in my mind ever since. Simply for this quote the book is one of my favourites. It sums up the wonderful philosophy that is employed throughout the book and I very much enjoyed the exploration of religion, belief and friendship in the book.

In this day and age religion is a very touchy subject. There is a lot of hate and anger in the world directed at religion and which people believe originates from religion.
I strongly dislike prejudice against religion. I fail to see how it is commonly accepted that racism is wrong, yet people seem to think it is perfectly fine to attack religion.

If you don't think this is true think how many people you hear attacking Christians for being 'bible bashers'. This kind of religious prejudice often goes unnoticed, people seem to think it is fine to attack Christians just because it is a large religion. Not so.
The major hostility towards Muslims is a huge problem in today's society, something I find absolutely disgusting.
I'm sure there are many other examples.

I will agree that there are religious people who try to force their religion on others and I am not happy with that. I believe we should be free to follow our own path. If we want to follow it with God, that is our choice, and if we don't that is likewise for us to decide. One should not feel pressured to join a specific religion or feel ashamed that they are of a particular religion.

The truth is, religious people can do horrible things, some do them in the name of their religion, but what is overlooked is that religious people also do beautiful things, and people do beautiful things in the name of religion.
We are so quick to jump to the bad that we overlook the good.

In my opinion it is wrong to kill in the name of God, because in my view God would not want us to kill. I do not support killing in the name of God because I think killing is wrong.
The God I believe in is loving, forgiving, protecting and peaceful. This God would not want wars started in name of religion. This God does not hate humans, he does not hate gays, blacks or any of the other ridiculous things that come out of people's mouths in the world. I believe we are meant to love eachother and cherish eachother and the life on our planet, despite skin colour or religion or sexuality.
I don't believe that God cares who you believe in or if you believe at all. I think God watches over everyone, no matter what.

I don't know if God is one being or many beings, woman, man, animal, plant... to me it's not important. It doesn't matter to me what that force looks like, only that I believe it is there and that belief makes me happy. I describe God as being 'the most good being' and that is all I can say to sum up what I believe in.
To me God is the most good thing that exists.

I've had an unusual upbringing in the light of religion. My father, grandmother and grandfather are all Spiritualists so that was the structure I was most in contact with as a child.
I retain a lot of the Spiritual upbringing that I was given however over the years I was encouraged to explore other religions too. As such I was never really bought up to believe in God as such, in fact I still don't know if my family do believe in a specific God. They let me look at whatever religion I liked without telling me any of it was right or wrong.

My grandmother bought me a bible and stories of fables for children, I remember I loved the bible because it had gold pages. One day I wanted to go to Church so my mum took me to sing hymns on a Sunday.

I chose to take an extra course in Religious Studies at GCSE. What I liked best about Religious Studies was that it allowed me to write about my opinions, it was never about a 'right' or 'wrong' answer. I loved that, it gave the chance to talk about what you believed in, although my teacher was Christian she never tried to tell us that Christianity was the only path.
I believe this is what religion should be about, it's not about the right or wrong answer.

I loved my teacher, she was very quiet and calm and even though the class was unruly she never raised her voice. She would always ask me how I was and how my health was at the time, she used to pat me on the arm, I liked that.

I took Philosophy at A level, one year of which was majorly focused on arguments for and against the existance of God. It was very interesting to sit in that class, and incredibly mind boggling. Many of my class mates were die hard atheists and it was interesting to hear what everyone had to say.

Now I am studying Acupuncture at University. Acupuncture is a Traditional Chinese Medicine which originated in ancient China.
Basically it is thought that many meridians run inside and on the surface of the body. These carry Qi (literally energy) through the body which maintains health. Qi exists throughout the entire universe, in all things, and all Qi is ruled over by Yin and Yang.
Yin and Yang are the two forces that comprise everything, Yin is feminine, dark, flexible, cold, constricting, down flowing and Yang is masculine, strong, hot, uprising and expanding. These two are in opposition to eachother and as such they control eachother. Neither is better or worse than the other as both must exist for there to be harmony in the world.
At the height of Yin it turns into Yang and vice versa, it is a constant cycle. Also there is also a little of Yin in Yang and Yang in Yin.
When Yin and Yang are in harmony the Qi in the body circulates properly and we are healthy in mind and body. When they become out of sync we can become ill physically, mentally or both.
TCM is very much connected to Taoism. In fact, the symbol for Taoism is the Yin and Yang symbol.

Taoism, to my understanding, says that there is a 'way' (the tao) in nature, it is the way that all things in nature follow instinctually and thus if we harmonise ourselves with nature we will be at peace. In Taoism there is 'wu wei' which means 'action with inaction'. This means that we do not try to force things to happen but simply by following nature's path we do things naturally and let everything happen as it should.

Taoism and TCM focus a lot on the elements. The elements of fire, water, wood, earth and metal exist in the body and in the world. They grow and are vanquished by eachother.
Also we cannot control them. This is an important message. We cannot control a flowing river, you cannot stop it flowing, you cannot change it's nature. You cannot stop wind from blowing if it wants to, you cannot change the nature of wood, metal or fire or earth.
If we fight against nature, if we plant our house right in the middle of the rushing river, we will eventually be knocked down. Life will be very hard. Alternatively if we walk beside the river with the wind at our backs we will find the walk much simpler.

In acupuncture we aim to harmonise Yin and Yang once more, make the elements work together so that we are healthy and happy.

Long story short Taoism is very influential to my way of life at the moment, I try to follow the path of nature.
Last year I was especially interested in Buddhism and the symbolism and imagery of Hinduism.

To me there are so many beautiful things in the world, so many things that make me happy and make us all happy. I don't know how these things got to be there, some believe God put them there, some don't, in my opinion any view is fine.

Below are some of the religious imagery I have found and enjoyed, they by no means represent all religions but I hope you will enjoy them:



Back to the quote at the beginning, I don't believe in hostility towards people because of their religion, I also don't personally believe it's right to try and force someone to be one thing or the other. In the novel Pi is a practicing Christian, Hindu and Muslim all at once. Though these religions are not 'supposed' to work together, hence the three religious leaders trying to convince Pi to choose only one.
Pi says these very wise words 'I just want to love God'.
In my eyes this is the most important part, just to love God in the way that you see fit. If you want to be all three of these at once, or any combination, I don't really see why you shouldn't.
So if you believe in God then that's great, and if you don't then that's great too. It's all good.

And lastly I think we should all be careful not to be prejudiced about religion. Just because some religious people can do bad things, it doesn't mean they all do. Do we hate everyone on earth just because some of them do awful things? No. So don't apply sweeping generalisations to religious people either.
Try to open up to others opinions, even if you don't agree. If someone is trying to force something on you then tell them you are not interested but sometimes all they want to do is talk to somebody about something they care about. Sometimes people do not have the intentions we think they do.

The angry man opens his mouth and shuts his eyes.

Feel free to tell me your opinions ^^

There is nothing but mystery in the world and we don't even know it.

"I realised it for the first time in my life: there is nothing but mystery in the world, how it hides behind the fabric of our poor, browbeat days, shining brightly, and we don’t even know it."

- The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd, page 58.

I managed to pick up The Secret Life of Bees at the charity shop on Valentines day and so far

this is my favourite quote from it.

It made me think, truly, about the way we live our lives. We rush about from place to place, event to event, muddled with emotions and feeling overcome by the things around us.

People seem riddled with insecurities on every possible subject. What if I I'm not pretty enough? What if I'm not interesting enough? What if this person doesn't like me? I'm not good enough, I'm not successful enough, I'm hopeless...

And often times when we feel insecure and unhappy we make others unhappy too. Sometimes we do it willingly and purposefully, thinking that everyone deserves to be as unhappy as we are, and sometimes we do it without even realising.

To the point, misery, sadness and insecurity can never bring good things to this world for anybody.

So I thought I would take this opportunity to post about all the little things that make me happy, things that bring sweetness to my life. I encourage you to do the same, please feel free to share your happiness with me!

1. I love Summer. I look forward to the months of May, June, July and August every year. Even the names of those months are somehow warm and pretty. I love every thing about it, the green trees, flowers, animals, the sounds, the smell that only seems to appear at that time of year, the fact that I can go to sleep when it's light and wake up to the sunshine and birdsong (I'm afraid of the dark). I like seeing the first signs of Spring emerging in February, the little flowers, the green buds on plants, the light drawing out night by night and the air getting warmer around you.
   
2. I love Love. It's cheesy, but feeling loved and feeling love make me feel great! I love it so much when you can get together with someone who is just so in sync with you, they know your interests and you share so many little things in common. For instance I love the way my boyfriend sings to our rats or pulls faces at me, how we have so many inside jokes I couldn't list them all, I love that he will watch Pokemon with me and I can know that he loves it just as much as I do. I love waking up next to him and seeing him fast asleep and how he wakes me up with a cuddle.
   It doesn't have to be just a significant other though. I love talking to my friends, laughing with them and sharing stories with them, helping them through hard times and confiding in them in my own. Knowing that they love me for who I am, knowing that they will always be there for me and knowing that they understand that I love them too.
   Or parents. Many people are quick to complain about theirs and of course I do too but the truth is I love my parents. I love my mum's carefree optimism and child like nature and my dads soft heart. I love having parents that support me in whatever I want to do when many other parents would turn the other way. I love having parents that I can talk to, that I can be friends with. Sure we can fight sometimes, sometimes they drive me crazy, but I've never felt that they didn't love me.
   And last of all I love myself. I think this is very important. You may not want to admit that you love yourself since it sounds very egotistical but I think it's a very healthy and integral part of being happy. Understand yourself, Accept yourself and do what makes you happy.
   Don't be afraid to be who you really are, regardless of what anybody else in this world says. Nobody has an opinion on you that is more important than your own.
   When you accept your flaws, but more importantly accept your perfections, I think it is much easier to be happy. Do you bake the perfect Sponge cake? Can people confide in you? Are you good at fixing motor cycles? Or maybe you give a really good hug. There are a lot of perfections in all of us and they far outweigh our flaws, believe me.
   Love yourself, you are always a better person then you think you are.
   
3. Animals. I love animals of all different kinds. I treasure my pets but I also treasure wildlife. I like a lot of animals that people don't like, I like bugs for example. I like wild animals, I like sea life, I like ugly animals and beautiful animals. I respect nature very deeply and find the characteristics of the life around us fascinating. What I like most is that you can never know what an animal is truly thinking. That amazes me... you can't ask them and you can't force them to tell you.
   I love that animals follow their instincts and seem to do what they were simply made to do. They do things that make them happy, something which I think humans can sometimes ignore. A pet cat will not sit on your knee unless it is happy there and you can't force it to sit with you but when it wants to, when it's happy to see you, it comes to you and purrs and makes it clear how affectionate it is to you.
   I love that domestic animals care about you. I'm not sure about other animals but I find pet cats are very sensitive to their owners emotions. I remember times of being very upset and crying in my room. Immediately I had all three of my cats all over me, meowing and pawing me, curling up as close to my face as they could, coming to look at me. My two girls would share the duty of coming into the room and checking on me, even though they never really got on, I could see them somehow communicating in the hallway. One of them very rarely came into my room at any other time but she would come in and pretend to look around for something, darting a look at me whenever it looked like I wasn't interested in her.
   Animals do this when you're sick too, I know mine won't budge from my bed when I'm ill and they're adamant for people to leave me alone.
   
4. Spirituality is very important to me. I don't especially identify with any one religion though I was bought up in a family of Spiritualists and try to live my life following the simplicity of Taoism. I have my beliefs and I feel safe with them, I feel that I don't have to worry when I die, I believe in God, although in a kind of complicated way. I like the way my faith makes me feel. I don't push my beliefs on other people since I believe it is the right of everyone to decide the path through life they want to follow. Whether you believe in God, many Gods or deities or none at all is completely your choice.
   
   
5. Old things. I love collecting old things. I like old clothes and old trinkets, ornaments, furniture, books... anything really. I like to imagine what life an item had before it came to me, I like making up stories to go with things.
   I also find that with a lot of old things there is a pull towards them. Somehow they grab you and drag you in, they tell you that you absolutely must have them. It's as if they've been waiting there just for you.
   This can lead me to purchasing a lot of random things that aren't really very useful but which make me happy. At the end of the day that's what matters most of all.
   
6. Drawing. I keep a moleskine with most of my sketches in it and I fill it up with little people. What I like most about these little people is they seem to come from nowhere, as if they just stepped out in front of me. I feel like I never know what I'm trying to draw until I'm done and then somehow they're just perfect in their own way.
   Planned drawing can be fun too, but this 'free flow' style is my most favourite.

I'm not trying to preach here that life is always peachy and you should never be down. Not so. Some things in life truly are horrible and it's simply not possible to see the bright side... If you're going through something awful, let yourself feel bad and let yourself heal from it properly.

But if it's little things in the every day that get you down, try to see the goodness that often gets missed whilst we're too busy looking at other things. Think about the things that make you happy and find simple pleasures. Those are the ones that crop up the most.

Most of all, love yourself. No matter what anybody tells you, we are all good at something and we all have something to offer.

"Wherever you look there is something to be seen."

Fashion meme

I was tagged by the lovely Johanne of http://kvestelser.blogspot.com/ to complete this fashion questionnaire, I hope you will enjoy!

What are your obsessions?

I am currently obsessed with the video game Lost Odyssey, released by Mistwalker. That connects to my obsession with the music of Nobuo Uematsu, he is my absolute favourite, my muse I suppose.

In style I am currently very interested in feminine and girly things, quaint and sweet things. Pale pink, green, teal blue, floral patterns, deers and unicorns and lovely old dresses are all important to me at the moment.

Oh and Pokemon! Especially the characters in Team Rocket, my favourite is James!

Describe your personal style?

Freedom. My freedom of choice in what I wear is extremely important to me.

I'm drawn to polkadots, white clothes, bold patterns and colours. I like to change my looks between feminine, when I will be very girly, or masculine when I like to wear a suit for example.

Basically I will wear whatever I want to wear, whatever I like. I think that sums up my personal style.

What are the staples in your wardrobe?

I'm not really sure, I suspect there are things that pop up in my outfits over and over if you look for them but I can't really think what they are.

I love my vintage ball gown and I love my petticoats.

What is your signature look?

I don't really have a signature piece of clothing I don't think, since I change it a lot. I suppose other people could say what they think from looking at me from their point of view!

I suppose my makeup is more my signature since I stick to the same thing a lot. I often do a thin layer of black eye liner, pink or red lipstick and pink rosey blush and eyeshadow.

What inspires you most?
I'm often inspired by art that I see, I love interesting drawings, cute things make me want to look cute too!
Colours also make me want to go and put them on. I think the psychological effect of colours is very interesting, whenever I'm inspired by drawings I want to do something creative like draw or dress up.

Music is also a great inspiration for me, different types yeild different outfits! At the moment I am very into Kanye West.


Who is your fashion muse?

I greatly admire my friend Alice of http://hystericgirl.blogspot.com/, I love her fresh approach to fashion, her great co ordination and her independent and confident attitude, choosing the dress however she likes. She has lovely clothes and is a great girl, I would love to go shopping and hang out with her.

As for catwalk, I very much enjoy Alexander McQueen's work, it has many interesting colours and shapes. I like Rei Kawakubo's work also.

Favourite purchase of all time?

Oh wow, this is difficult...

My favourite posession overall is my happy hat. It's a white leapord print hat with ears that I bought in Manchester on my first date with my boyfriend.

It holds very special memories to me and whenever I feel sad I put it on and it eases my worries.

As for clothes I think it's probably my white sailor lolita dress, you can see pictures of it a few posts down!

Biggest splurge?

The most I have spent on one thing at once I think is about £75 for some of my lolita dresses. I really don't tend to spend a lot of money on each individual piece, I'm a child of the second hand store.


What's your beauty routine?

I really don't have one, which is probably why I have bad skin and my dark eyes are worse than they should be. I mainly use tea tree and peppermint facial wipes however I also use St Ives Apricot Exfoliating Scrub.
I use an ivory tone of concealer that my boyfriend bought for me, it's 'perfect' something or other. I use a light powder on top of that.
I then use a makeup set I bought years ago for blush, it's elysse brand and it's technically for little girls who want to play with makeup xD

I have many different tubes of red lipstick of varying brands or I use red lip gloss.


What jewellery do you never take off?

I honestly don't wear any jewellery at the moment.
I did have a simple silver ring my boyfriend made in class before we ever met and it fit me perfectly, I kind of took that as a sign. It was perfect and I never took it off but one day I lost it somehow and was never able to find it again.

What are you wishing for?

A job I will enjoy, a great house with Chris and our sweetlings and good fortune in my art course when I start it.

I tag whoever wants to do this! I'd be interested to read so please link me to your response ^^

Is it impossible to translate high fashion to the every day?

(the fur in this outfit is not real ^^)

Above are some of the photos I have taken of my outfits over the past 6 months or so. Unfortunately with my lolita clothes I always seem to take photos after I've gone out to do something fun and oddly crease inducing. They look much better when worn properly but I hope you won't mind!

What I want to talk about now is the translation of high fashion, catwalk style to high street wear.

This subject has been on my mind for a little while and usually my boyfriend gets to hear my grumblings on it. It's a subject that definitely bothers me and interests me simultaneously.

I've been reading quite a few women's magazines of late. I won't pretend I don't enjoy reading them because I definitely do. I read magazines such as Vogue, ELLE, ID and Grazia. I like to experience subjects from a distinctively female point of view, and often a point of view that I don't conform to personally.

I tend to find things in women's magazines that really rile me up. I'm especially angered by the stance that many magazines take towards men and their position in a modern woman's life. I disagree with the idea that a woman should not want a man, that she is weak if she considers a relationship. I cannot agree with the idea that the female species could function without men because I don't think it's possible. By the laws of nature we need both male and female to recreate.

Because of this, and many other reasons, I think it is entirely natural to want a relationship, to want a man and to care about a man in your life. You do not have to be a man hater in this modern society, despite what many want to tell us.

Women's magazines now look down on women who fulfill those roles they see as demeaning. In my opinion though, the role is only demeaning based on the opinion of the woman in that role.

The house wife is a classic example of the role that is now looked down on in the female society. Articles are very quick to suggest that any woman who 'gives in' to being a housewife is somehow weaker and inferior to her business woman peers.

They will not consider the idea that a woman may want to fulfill that role, that may make them truly happy. If that makes you happy then who is anyone to say you shouldn't do it?

If we want to be seen as progressive, as different, as positive I feel we should be embracing the many roles we can take in society, both men and women, and supporting one another for our honest choice and decision to do what we like instead of criticizing one another for it.

This brings me to the real point I wanted to highlight. Opinion.

Everyone, and nobody moreso than the writers and editors of these women's magazines, seems to care so, so much about what everybody else thinks about them.

In the March issue of ELLE for example there is an article about how to shop 'intelligently'.

The woman in this article states that she understands the certain 'staples' of fashion, but 'I want somebody to tell me what to wear.'

Only around 20 pages earlier is various pages on designers who are deemed to have 'broken the mold' for example Vivienne Westwood, John Galliano and Sonia Rykiel who gives her top 10 tips on fashion.

I noticed that some of her top tips included dressing for yourself and disgarding the opinions of others. She said that you should never ask for the opinion of others, especially not your partner, as you should know yourself how you want to dress and this is the way you should dress no matter what anybody thinks.

It annoys me that magazines present such contridictory ideas within a short space of one another. What idea is this presenting to the women reading it?

It's not clear or helpful. It makes you feel confused, thinking Well should I take the advice of others or not?

Vivienne is telling you to get creative but somebody else is trying to tell you exactly how to dress, exactly what you should wear and what you should buy 'intelligently'.

The idea of dressing 'intelligently' is completely wrong to me. I think that dressing and buying your clothes intelligently simply requires that you use your head. This really isn't that hard, you live in it all the time.

In my opinion, your head will always tell you what you are interested in. You will like certain shapes, certain patterns, colours, cuts and so on and your eyes will be drawn to them. That's what makes things interesting, amoung us there are so many different tastes.

So listen to your mind, why do you care what everybody else thinks, why stick to the safe if it isn't what makes you happy?

If the blazer and pencil skirt and louboutin pumps please you, by all means I support your choice in using them. But if they don't, if you're interested in metallic silver platform boots or tye dye, why not make your wardrobe out of that? If you want to mix them then I say do it!

Women are far too concerned with 'in season'. Fashion changes as fast as the wind does, you're never going to keep up with it. If you live your life by the seasons you have to keep changing your style constantly anyway, so why not do away with that ideology and simply indulge in the pieces you honestly like?

Your personal style will change over time, you will like things and then grow to dislike them, or dislike things and grow to like them. This is perfectly fine, allow your interests to flow.

The point is, you will never keep up with fashion, so why try so hard?

Simply keep up with your own interests, evolve in whatever direction you feel like, buy those items you absolutely must have at the time, whatever anyone says, because you have to live in the moment.

Women who wear what they like look confident. Whatever it is, if you like it I believe you will carry it off.

This just brings me to the contrast between catwalk and street style. Why is it that all these fashions that appear in the magazines are not allowed onto the high street? You can take a motif or theme from a magazine that all the women are drooling over and employ it in your every day style, step out of the door and at least 75% of people will look at you like you're poisonous.

Why is this?

Why is it socially unacceptable to wear the catwalk fashions?

Is colour and interesting shape so forbidden?

The pictures are of the catwalks, the intense makeup and shapes and colours, the ideas, the symbolism, but the high street sections are filled with 'safe' options of black, white and certain others sometimes. But why live so boringly? Because of fear. They all seem to be afraid of other women, what they think but I cannot understand why it matters, at all.

They're conducting interviews with the designers they admire, who are telling us to be bold, be different, be individual, who we should listen to because they are the ones who followed their heart and then they're telling you straight after to sit in your box and do not move from it under any circumstances.

They tell us not to develop our personal style, especially not ourselves. According to these magazines you absolutely MUST hire a proffessional to dress you, you must always involve your friends and you must only buy what is deemed by the majority to suit you. Don't forget that your opinion is the least important one!

I think this is ridiculous.

Life is made for living and I want to live mine boldly, without regrets. I want every woman and man to wear what they like, to cast aside the useless opinion of others and follow your instincts.

So I'm going to go out and buy whatever clothes I happen to like and wear whatever I please whilst doing it. I'll wear designer, bold colours, bright colours, patterns, plain or all together if that's what I feel like.

And that is dressing truly intelligently.

Standing out

Firstly I thought I would post some of my favourite pictures of myself! I took these in 2008 during the summer time in my garden at home, the flower I'm holding had dropped off one of my mum's plants so I decided to use it.

These pictures were actually a test shoot to see if I could pull off a 'magical girl' style, more precisely Sakura from Card Captor Sakura!

I love how they turned out, they have a strange dreamy quality about them I think. The pictures with my cats in them make me especially happy, they were all accidents, whilst I was taking the pictures my cats were getting very excited that I was home, since I don't live with them most of the time now, and they kept rushing over to see me every time I sat on the ground. They wanted to be fussed and brush against me, hence why they appear in the shots!

What I'm thinking about today though is standing out.

Have you ever had that experience where you're walking down the street, or talking to somebody and you look completely normal yet they still seem to keep away from you? They still eye you with the same sense of uneasiness as when you go out dressed to the nines?

In my experience I feel that more people notice me and are 'disturbed' by me when I'm dressed completely normally than when I'm walking around town with my best dress on!

I always wonder why this happens. I check myself thoroughly in the mirror before going out and to my eyes I look just like one of them. I don't stand out.

So what is it that doesn't quite fit?

I think standing out is an important issue. A lot of people feel uncomfortable when they stand out from the crowd, some people don't mind if they do or not and some people absolutely love it!

There's nothing wrong with any of these things, but I do find it interesting that sometimes people who love standing out, or see their style as a sort of social rebellion, will look down on people who are sometimes comfortable to stand out, and sometimes comfortable to blend in.

Personally, sometimes I like to just throw on a basic, normal outfit and go out. Sometimes I won't even put makeup on. In my opinion it is okay to be part of the crowd if you want to, we don't always have to make a statement every time we leave the house.

Our style is most natural to us when we let it flow and that means that if you don't feel like dressing up you don't have to, and if you do then you go right ahead. Forcing yourself to do either one usually results in an outfit you don't feel comfortable and confident in.

However, I've noticed that I actually can't seem to fit in seamlessly. People always call my bluff. Maybe this is because I don't really keep up with trends and thus I'm not wearing the right clothes, or maybe my looks just don't translate well to moving around in real life... I really don't know.

My boyfriend is also particularly vulnerable to this happening to him which is very odd. To me my boyfriend looks normal, he wears the same type of t-shirts and the same type of pants and shoes and jackets as most other guys, most of the time. Despite that people often call him goth and I wonder how they know he's not into all the same things as them just by looking at him.

Perhaps it's our air that puts people on edge. When you go out wearing something radically different, in general you get a lot of response. Sometimes it's good, people coming up to you and complimenting you or taking your picture, often times its bad such as people laughing or shouting at you.

The thing is, you learn to develop this skin. You learn to defend yourself from these things when you go out, for example I listen to music so that I can't hear what people say and they think I can't hear which deters some of them from bothering me.

If I notice somebody eyeing me up to insult me, I make myself busy with something. It's not fear of them that makes me do these things, they simply stop people from harrassing me, or at least put them off. Despite what anyone says I don't think anyone appreciates being bullied in public, no matter how out there you are, and if you can avoid it then you do.

So this air, this confidence and defiance that most people don't seem to develop, is this what frightens people?

It's hard to know because you often won't notice your own stance or behaviour because that's how you've come to act no matter how you're dressed.

Sometimes I look back on my interactions with people and realise that from their perspective I probably looked very intimidating. I look at the way I was standing or talking around them and realise I was somehow holding myself differently and communicating with them differently from other people.

Sometimes it's probably my hair, or how pale my skin is, or something small like that. Having unnaturally coloured hair such as blue or purple means you always stand out and people can always tell you are different. If you're not tanned, simillarly people find you an anomaly to look at. I can understand this because in the sea of brown hair, bleached hair and tan skin, somebody with purple hair and extremely pale skin is going to look strange.

It's when I took completely normal that the responses confuse me the most. When my hair is just a natural normal colour and I'm wearing makeup and completely common place clothes, people still do it.

Perhaps subconciously we just style ourselves differently, no matter what kind of outfit we are wearing. We develop a different eye for colour and shape because our clothes are unusual and we don't have the magazines or the display windows telling us how to assemble things, we have to do the trial and error ourselves.

Somehow you've managed to put on a t-shirt a hundred other girls have, and yet it looks completely different from how they would wear it.

The exact reason for it I suppose I'll never know. If this happens to you though, take it as a positive thing. If people are noticing you whether you're dressed up or not, and you're sometimes nervous to go out dressed in something truly bold, then take this as your que.

People somehow pick up on us 'alternative' people, as if they can smell us, so it really doesn't matter what you wear. You might as well go out dressed however you want, because the response you get is going to be different from those 'normal' people every time, no matter what you look like.

Welcome to dear S W E E T L I N G S

Hello everybody, I hope you are all having a great day wherever you are in this world!

I feel an introductory post would probably be beneficial.

My name is Juliet and I hail from the United Kingdom. I live with my partner with our two pet rats named Tolten and Happy.

I am 19 years old and I have a rather child like nature. I enjoy Disney films, playing games, reading books and dressing up! My clothing style is definitely not quiet, or at least not most of the time, but I think that is the most fun way to live. For me personally anyway :)

My interest in fashion is largely what bought me to creating this blog and will be the main content here as well. I have been interested in clothing and appearence for many years now and starting from my early teens I have never really managed to fit into what is generally considered to be the 'normal' stereotype. For this reason I'm not only interested in our personal expression through our clothing but also the reaction that we garner in society through our appearance.

I'm fortunate that I have some great friends and family surrounding me, all of whom have their own strong sense of style and have encouraged me to branch out into whatever interest or field that might take my fancy at any time that I please.

My father is always trying to encourage me to become more gothic or more hippy or something else suitably outrageous and interesting looking and my mother is of the opinion that you should try anything once, and if that includes having bright blue hair then she's more than willing to do the dying herself.

I feel very grateful to have the friends and family that I do. I'm not sure how I would have grown up had my environment not been as conducive to following your fancy wherever it leads you. This is a lifestyle that I reccommend to you! I truly believe that your heart will tell you where to go, and that if you follow it you will find it much easier to be and stay happy.

However it seems to me that, whilst there are many people out there who are confident in their own skin, following their own hearts on whatever path they choose, there are also those who are shy and lack the encouragement they need and deserve in order to come out of their shells.

Hearing about those who feel too shy, too inadequate or somehow unworthy to be who they really want to be makes me sad. I believe that everybody has the right to express themselves freely and we are all worthy of notice and praise.

Whether we are goth, hippy, grunge or pop it doesn't matter to me. If your idol is Kurt Cobain or Janis Joplin or Britney Spears I don't mind either way. I think that we all have the right to be whoever we want to be, irrespective of what society at large may think of us.

On this blog I intend to post pictures of what I have been wearing as well as any topics or musings I find especially interesting. I enjoy delving into the mind of society and I find that fashion is a very interesting way to do this. I find responses to different styles and outfits quite fascinating so the posts here may be about common reactions that I have noticed or why I think certain reactions will happen.

I also study Art and thus drawing, painting and photography are all important parts of my life. I don't claim to be a great artist, but I enjoy the work that I do and may post it here along with inspirations that I have picked up from various places.

Lastly there may sometimes be posts on little trinkets I have found whilst on my hunt through second hand shops. I'm quite notorious for my inability to leave cute things behind, especially if they don't cost me very much, so you may find posts about second hand clothing and ornaments that I have found.

Overall this blog is simply to share my love of fashion and the sweet little things in life that make me happy.

I don't intend to try and influence any of you who may read it, I simply offer my own opinion and try to help build and maintain confidence in everyone. If I can do this then I will be happy!